Food for thought

Interesting thoughts on prayerlessness.
Click on the link above.

Halloween Preview

This little monkey just cracks me up dancing around in his costume.

Friday Funday

This post is just a reminder to myself that we do have good days too. Thursday after my last post Caed pretty much cried off and on until 10:30 pm shortly after Andy got home. I am so thankful both of my sisters had decided to come over for the afternoon and evening and for friends that bring meals.

We had a fun time with our Moms Up a Creek group from church. Those wonderful girls helped watch Dane while I had to care for Caed. And the best part was Dane fell asleep in the car and slept until 4:15. I didn't do anything but sit on the couch and Caed hardly cried all day. It can happen. There are good days, and bad ones, but there wouldn't be good days with out the bad.

Is it Friday yet?

Just wanted to post a few pictures while I had time, and jot down some randomness. Andy had yesterday off since he had to work all day last Saturday. So today feels like Monday for some reason. For the first time in the 2 weeks both boys are napping at the same time. And why oh why am I not? Probably because I caught a 2 hour nap yesterday and am feeling pretty good. Though I really should have napped again. My sisters should be here anytime so at least relief is on it's way.
Three weeks have already come and gone way to fast. And tomorrow I am hoping to go on my first fun outing alone with the boys. I survived the doctor alone on Tuesday for Caed's check up. Things went really smooth until the Dr started talking to me and then they both fussed and whined until he left the room and then things went smoothly again.
I can see I am tired enough to not complete an entire thought. So here are a few more pictures.

This little guy offered me a few small smiles this morning. None that I caught on camera but it's fun to see him starting to respond :o)

Here they are in their matching outfits for church.

Dane loves to make sure all of the contraptions are turned on and operating at full speed. What a helper. He does what he can!

2 weeks

Has it already been 2 weeks since Caedmon was born? My mom has already been here for a week and left. We have had our first two days home alone. Things have been going well. I haven't had very high expectations or tried to accomplish much of anything, or go anywhere by myself. It's keeping things relaxed. Though I think Dane is bored out of his mind. The boy likes to go places and do things. He is adjusting. He really didn't want me around the first week and kept trying to hit me and occasionally bite me. He has always liked the baby, but sometimes he asks me to put him in his crib so I can play with him. I am finding a balance of splitting my between the two. Though taking care of a newborn seems so much easier this time around, but yet things are just as hard because I have two babies to take care of now. I am enjoying it, I feel so satisfied. I love how our family has expanded!

Caedmon has already rolled over. Last week he was on his tummy and rolled to his back and Sunday I finished changing his diaper and he rolled over to his stomach, and boy was he mad about that. It must be a crazy newborn reflex. He can't even hold his head up yet.

Here are a few of my favorite snapshots from the last 2 weeks.

My Boys

We have found Dane several different times laying on the floor like this trying to play. He is actually trying to lay the same way I am. The boy makes me laugh. Speaking of making me laugh, you know what made this boy laugh so hard he was almost in tears? Andy said "honky tonk badonka donk", just like the song. Dane thought it was the funniest thing his little ears have ever heard. He had us all laughing so hard we were almost in tears.

Dane has nicknamed him 'Bittle' Baby John. He has a hard time saying Caedmon or Caed so he settled with little baby John. He is getting better though at calling him by his given name.

A special surprise

While I was away having a baby two of my awesome friends planned a bathroom makeover for my stinky little bathroom I have been wanting to spruce up. This picture doesn't even do it justice to how dark and small and stinky it felt. The flash on the camera actually made the color brighter than it is (I mean was) in person.

It was the best surprise ever coming home from the hospital to have a big project completed. And I love it! Though I did have a hunch something was going on. After all, my mom, not knowing about the plan had offered to paint it while she was here encouraged me to purchase the paint before she arrived. Andy had already purchased some paint. So after I bought the paint a few days before Caedmon arrived Andy took an unusual interest on the return policy and what color the paint was and where I had put the paint so he could see the color. It wasn't that exciting of color, mostly white with a hint of blue. Then at the hospital he did step out of the room for a phone call and didn't fill me in on who (or is it whom? I don't really care) had called. It was ok I had a new baby so I wasn't going to bother myself with the peculiar behavior. The after pictures really don't do it justice but how do you even attempt to photograph such a tiny space? Trust me it looks amazing. They switched out the mirrors, painted the cabinet black and all the trim black, bye-bye oak trim! And the ceiling is black, which I think it all looks just perfect! They left the towel hook and cabinet hardware for me to pick out which I am excited about. I just need to find some time and energy to do some shopping.
Thank you girls for such an awesome gift!!

Birth Story

The two births I have been through could not have been any different. Click here to read about Dane. It took me a year to finally write about it. The only thing that was the same was that I elected to be induced both times. Somewhat guiltily because I really did want to go into labor on my own but yet not bad enough to wait for the baby to get huge, I was a little (or A LOT) afraid of tearing again and the starting to hemorrhage. This time however I will not wait a year to relive the birth story.

We arrived at the hospital Tuesday morning to be induced around 7:30. Of course it takes awhile to get all the stats done and hooked up to everything. So I think they started the pitocin around 8:30 or 9. I really didn't feel much for contractions until around 10 or 10:30am. I was mentally prepared from my last experience for it to be a long day in the hospital and we would have a baby sometime that evening.

My thinking both times had been if things seem like they will go fast I can probably make it a while with out an epidural. And if I am in a lot of pain and it seems like it would be that way for many hours I would definitely be getting an epidural. Besides an epidural can slow labor especially if you get it too soon, so they don't really want you to get it right away anyway.
I knew I would try and manage on my own for awhile and I did warn my nurses that if I did ask for the fentinal (pain relieving drug) that would mean I was at my limit and go ahead and order the epidural at the same time.
I had talked to my friend Kristin a few weeks before telling her how I did want to go into labor on my own and my feelings of feeling guilty and such. And she told me her experiences and how she (due about 6 weeks after me) was starting to practice the hypno birthing which it is recommend to start five weeks before the due date. She said basically in a nut shell you just concentrate on staying relaxed through the pain. Don't fight the pain just let it come over you and relax. So I did just that. Little did I know I should have been mentally preparing for actual birth (with out an epidural) as well.

I finally gave in and asked for the fentinal and the epidural. The fentinal helped for a few minutes and they said the epidural would be 15 - 20 minutes someone else was before me. That was the carrot dangling in front of me. Just hang on a few more minutes for the epidural to get there and things will be better. I pretty much spent most of my time laying motionless on my side with my eyes closed just concentrating on relaxing. I was very unaware of everything going on around me. They checked me when they gave me the fentinal and said I was at a 6 or 7. I vaguely heard them tell me let us know if you feel you have to push. During that next contraction I just nodded my head a little I did feel like i had to push a a little but it felt more like I needed to use the restroom and that would sure be embarrassing. I started wondering that I must be getting close when someone came over and slapped an ID bracelet on me and did my finger prints with my limp hand, even though I was still hoping and waiting for the epidural. On my next contraction my body just started pushing. I do barely remember hearing them looking for a doctor, mine was in a c-section. She got there just in time to deliver Caedmon (with out a sterile utensil table- no time for that). Then she returned to her c-section. I did lose control of staying on top of the pain once I realized he was coming out with no epidural. I think I was so scared of tearing all the way through again that the fear over came me. But it was over and done with before I knew it. Not 15 minutes after I asked for an epidural, I had a baby in my arms at 12:40pm. I did have some 2nd degree tearing, but after the first few hours most all of my pain had already subsided. Unlike with my first I was in pain for weeks afterward. I didn't know it was possible to feel good after labor. Well I have seen people feel good after labor, I just didn't think it was possible for me to feel good after labor. I just thank God he answered all my prayers and we had the best possible out come!

I have to say though the excitement is wearing off a bit and the sleepless nights are catching up with me. First night home went ok, though Caedmon was up from 3 am to 6 am and we went through all of our baby sheets the first night home. Let the laundry begin!

Stay tuned to hear about one of the gifts I received!

It's a Boy!

Caedmon John Fogle

Born: September 28, 2010 at 12:40pm

Weight: 8 pounds 4 ounces

Height: 20 3/4 inches long

Proud big brother
New and expanded family